A little about me

Monday, January 23, 2012


I have to admit to being on the verge of crying after I finished the text messages and not so much for the content but for the shame and hurt I still feel. Even though almost 3 years have passed the ache in my heart has not left. The fear. The raw emotions immediately after leaving are gone but the other emotions are still very close to the surface.

Terry has to take a short trip to look at a few handy man projects for a family member but he could be gone awhile. Before he left I told him I would run to the hardware store to pick up some seed packets that are on sale and maybe do a few more errands but as he reminded me that would take me into Crazy Man territory and since he is "Unemployed" at this time I may run into him.

I just sighed, now I am hesitant to go now. Terry said that he would tag along tomorrow if I could wait to run around... I wish Crazy Man could just leave us alone. I feel as though my safe place is under fire again because I am sure he will try to figure out how to find us. I have no doubt in my mind about this. I am sure since he was unable to really ask the girls questions about home he is itching to figure it out.

I sent off the text messages to my attorney and the reply back was that as disturbing as the messages were,Crazy Man "CAN" text or email me as long as it is concerning parenting or parenting time. And he "CAN" call the girls as stated in an earlier ruling in 2010. Go figure! He has to have supervised visits but they can be allowed to talk to him unsupervised on the phone?! HUH?! I remembered that this was the same court date that they lost our case and I believe the Magistrate made a uninformed decision on concerning the telephonic communications between him and the girls unsupervised.

I am trying to lose myself in things around the farm and excited to show pictures from the place. But in case Crazy Man is checking out my blogs I can't. I show some but not of the exact place or too much of the surroundings. It's a drag but for the time being I don't want him to know the exact location until I know he won't stalk us here. Wishful thinking!

Here are a few pictures of Christmas for your enjoyment...

 Built- in Sideboard! We found some great stemware in a barn that are just lovely!
 The pantry that was just a hole in the wall, but had been a pantry back in the day. Terry patched holes, made shelves and found a stool for me (I'm kind of shrinking as the years go by)!
 The other wall to hang up my apron, cast iron trivets and of course our pencil sharpner! I love my pantry!

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