Living in the past

I made a conscious decision to really write about my past. I'm stumped. A friend of mine was insistant that I write to the local papers and try to shed some light into a dark past. I couldn't do it. I hemmed and hawed. OK, well, I wrote to Dr. Phil, and a few other popular celeb programs. Nothing... I did type something to a Editor at one of the papers my friend linked to me but still nothing...

If you aren't a superstar or politician nothing that I am going to yell about is going to make much difference apparently. Sadly you have to be murdered or missing to have anyone take someone with a DV background heard. I do not wish that to be me or my loved ones.

I have been back in forth with the GAL and my Attorney about my STBX getting my physical address. I am getting myself all in a tizzy because of it. I try to act calm and if you see me on the street, I will just tell you nothing is up or wrong. I don't want to talk about my divorce or him. Believe me that sounds funny. I have been so wrapped up in the drama of my life for so many years that I would like it to be gone, with both of us moved on happily. I feel I blog about him so much on here I don't feel the need to talk about him. It is as if I am giving him more power (in my head) by yakking about him. And dang it! He is like a bad penny you can't get rid of. My divorce is a topic of conversation that 95% of the time comes up in conversation.  Oh, don't get me wrong, I appreciate that those around me that give me prayers or comfort! My divorce is like the flu... A lot of crap and you want the vaccine next time it comes around!

I did feel it is time to write. I'm totally unsure and in the dark where to start but the time is right at least it feels that way.

As for an update in this nasty ride:

No new court date slated yet
Crazy man is in contempt of court for not doing the psych eval and my attorney is pushing for one!
As of Monday, I heard Crazy man was working. I had no doubt about that... He is squirreling away money. How else can he pay his attorney, bills and so on? Last time I had child support was in December.
 Crazy man was spanked by his attorney not to call me or text me anymore. Unless it is an emergency. After all his complaining about talking to the girls on the phone he has yet to call them. Though I do have a text stating he tried and he couldn't get through... SIGH! Also he was told I did not kidnap the girls and have been legally doing what I need to do correctly. YEA ME!

I'd rather not dwell on these things. Living in the past just clouds thoughts of a happy future. In a fit of passion I decided to diet and give up coffee. Not for Lent (I don't do that). Just because I decided to break some habits. I add way to much sugar to it anyway. I splurged one last hooray on a bunch of Rolo's last night. DROOL! Wish me luck!

Mel