Okay! I didn't honestly wish that. But, hear me out, Al had his faults:
He drank but he didn't come home slap Peg or the kids around or call them names.
He was crude- He was off color and was skimming the creepy side of checking out women.
Made some really bad decisions- Despite this, he almost always came up on top in the end.
He was always dreaming of hooters- He still was faithful and came home to Peg.
He was a shoe salesman but he had a job.
He loved his family- There was a moral to the plot as campy as they were.
If there was a situation that didn't end well he made up with Peg and the kids.
I know that is not real life, but around the time of the Huxtable's (Pre-scandal) and Keaton's, this was about the time I wished I had a family and husband like those TV families. I would have settled for Al! Do you know what I mean?
Al and the other TV husband's I could handle being married to. Living from day to day in the life I was at that time was scary! There was never a moment when we had bliss without an underlying thought of when is he going to fly off the handle?
Oh, the list of 'Why did I not leave sooner" is as long as my arm. Reflecting back things had to end as they did. I feel I am at this pivotal point where I am honestly comfortable with that amazing woman in the mirror. She stepped out of faith and took a leap though she was scared and fearful. Letting go and trusting God while skeptical is not easy. This took a lot of thought! You would think this would be a no-brainer, but it was an inner fight with my spirit to say, "I'm gone!" Now, I can say that I do this not only for serving my God, but to be a voice for those that are forever silenced by abuse.
If you are teetering, I get it! I've been there, got the t-shirt and the postcard. If you can make a plan to leave. Get in touch with your local shelter for tips and suggestions. Contact the police department for help, many departments have advocates that can help. Of course, there are times you just have to go ASAP!
I started a Facebook group that want to talk connect with other Overcomers and victims. I'm changing the group settings to private. If you are interested message me privately on my page- Hope when there was none. I hope to add Ladies that are coaches, business mavens, or visionaries that can also share information with members. Not as a buy this program informercial but to help. I'm putting feelers out for this one.
Is there a topic that you would like to see here? Let me know!
Wherever you are on your journey please stay safe, Dear One. I believe in you!
BIG HUGS,
Mel
*Have you ever wondered why I leave a picture of me? It's not a vanity thing. I leave a picture so you can put a face to abuse. I share it to remind you that I could be your neighbor, friend, or family member. I leave my picture because I'm alive to do so. I survived and want you to know that you can too!*
I have been getting many new visitors which always leaves me with mixed feelings. I want to give you a shout and say, "Welcome! We hit 138,000 views and this blog post is #298! Please subscribe and thanks for stopping!" but I feel conflicted to break out the balloons. You see, many of you are here because you are seeking answers on how to deal with an abusive situation and not to look up the latest craft or recipe.
There were times when I wanted to throw in the towel and not blog anymore because of feeling that I couldn't help anyone that reads these posts. Heck, there were times I could barely help myself! How could I give words of wisdom to the many that have emailed me privately?
The days and weeks following leaving my ex, I swear I could have taken out stock in tissue. It seemed like every time I turned around my eyes were leaking. I cried so many tears I was surprised I had salt left in my tears. (Yes, that song by Martin Briley is now playing in my head for those of you that were around in the '80s do you remember the song?)
It wasn't until THIS YEAR that I embraced my "calling" or my "purpose". What is it? This! This blog, my books, going out to speak about my story, making videos and meeting people to hear they're stories. To give a hug or just listen.
Now, you may be saying, "But, you have been doing this all along!" I had a hard time realizing that THIS is what I need to do. Seriously! If you look at some of my posts you may find me whining about not knowing what I should do with my life.
This is not just any blog, the book sales are not to make money, (I have given more books and royalties away than what I pocketed- not a brag!) or the speaking I have done is not just for fanfare.
It's for my children. So they can learn that the relationship I was in with their father was not normal. That love doesn't have to physically or mentally hurt.
And there is YOU! Yes, you and those that are unsure if they should leave. It's for those that no longer can speak due to their lives being taken from domestic abuse. Know you are not alone Dear One.
If you are unsure where to start on your journey take a peek at the most popular blog posts here-
Early warning signs of an abusive personality
Status hearing next week
Gaslight's- Sociopath mind games
Positive affirmations for you!
Violence is an EXCLUSIVE GROUP and CLUB!
Positive affirmations, a new Vision board, and 5 goals!
Positive affirmations for victims
The effects of Family violence with children
What to expect from a shelter
Advice from Survivors of abuse
Keeping yourself safe after you have left an abusive situation
Checklist for leaving an abuser
Girl! You need a safety plan!
Tips to keep YOU safe during the holidays
I hope this helps you on your journey! If you need to talk feel free to message me privately at blessmeplz@gmail.com.
I started a closed group page for victims and Overcomers to share and encourage one another with respect. I will be changing this to a secret group at the beginning of the year.
Find it here to join-Hope when there was none group
Check out my page here- Hope when there was none page
Have I told you lately that I love you?
BIG HUGS!
Mel
I know that is not real life, but around the time of the Huxtable's (Pre-scandal) and Keaton's, this was about the time I wished I had a family and husband like those TV families. I would have settled for Al! Do you know what I mean? 
Al and the other TV husband's I could handle being married to. Living from day to day in the life I was at that time was scary! There was never a moment when we had bliss without an underlying thought of when is he going to fly off the handle? 
If you are teetering, I get it! I've been there, got the t-shirt and the postcard. If you can make a plan to leave. Get in touch with your local shelter for tips and suggestions. Contact the police department for help, many departments have advocates that can help. Of course, there are times you just have to go ASAP! 
Wherever you are on your journey please stay safe, Dear One. I believe in you!
