A little about me

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Brook, IN, United States
Abuse doesn't stop at the court room. Melinda has shared her battles in her life and through the court room as she navigates through the legal system Bringing encouragement, insight and empowerment to those that are in a abusive relationship. She is in the process of creating a new life, speaking engagements to "Break the Silence" of abuse, while putting a face to abuse. She is currently working on writing a book about her experiences as a Survivor.View short Bio here- https://www.patheos.com/blogs/ahappymedium/2013/02/notbrokenbutbrave/

Monday, June 27, 2016

Drama Queen

WELL! My post set off some fire I'm afraid.

SO not my intention! It never is! If you have been with me through this crazy blog experience you have read that I enjoy my nucleus of NON DRAMA.

What has gotten my granny panties in a bunch... maybe not a bunch. I had to chuckle for a change with this exchange. I received a message from my ex's wife! She had asked  demanded I take mention of her off my blog or she would talk to her attorney.

I did take sometime to formulate a rebuttal and honestly I thought of quite a few snappy ones but decided against them. Despite telling Terry I wasn't going to answer and just blow off the email, I later reconsidered and sent back a short one.

You see, in the beginning of my blog, my ex raised the same threats so I covered myself by asking my attorney what the ramifications if I blogged about my ex or mentioned his name. I was told that ask long as I was speaking the truth, not mentioning last names or other personal stuff that this would be okay and also there is that wonderful FREEDOM OF SPEECH! This Dear Blog reader is why I still blog today!

We exchanged a few more emails. One return email stated that I didn't know her. I replied that I agreed, noting I heard we had a lot in common. If the circumstances were different we would be good friends. Her reply was that I need to keep her out of "MY DRAMA" and not to email her again.

HUH?! Scratching my head.

She emailed me originally!

She also does not know me. The only thing she knows is what my ex and my Son have told her.

I don't blame her. She is spoon fed what she thinks is the truth of the matter.

That my ex is a good man. That he deserves to see his children since he is paying his child support and up to date. That I am violating court papers for not allowing them to visit or sleep over.

Oh boy! We have had exchanged emails in the past and I didn't share them here before. And I'm not sure why.

I don't blame her.

Our court papers do not go into details about how abusive my ex was.

Or how he threatened our GAL and court appointed Counselors.

Our court papers do not go into how my ex threatened to kill us.

Or that he would find me and get even with me for leaving him someday when I least expect it. I believe he will have someone hired again to harm me/us or continue to use our Son to do so.

Our divorce was over before I found about about my Daughter being molested by this monster my ex and you can bet I would have brought that before the police if I knew sooner about the incidents.

I respect her wishes and will not email her. No problem here!

I hope that he never makes her feel so small that she wishes she could vanish when he is in a "mood".

I hope she never gets a spanking from him.

I hope she never is intimidated in front of friends and family.

I hope she never gets into the situation where she is told if she leaves he will kill her and her loved ones (or himself).

I hope she is never isolated from her friends and family.

I hope she never has to cover up bruises with makeup or long clothing.

I hope she never has to hear that she "provoked" his outbursts

I hope she never has to worry about him coming home in a bad mood.

I hope she never has to endure silence for hours or days if she was to "blame" for something going wrong in his day or at some outing.

I hope she will never have to go through several hours of grilling because some man or woman you briefly chatted with because you are thinking of "having an affair" with them.

I hope she doesn't have to check in with him 3 or more times every hour.

I hope she can come home late and not have to worry that he is thinking she is screwing around.

I hope she doesn't have to worry about how she dresses.

I pray she never has to worry that she will die in her sleep by the hand of her new husband.

I pray that she is right about him changing to be this great guy. In the 20+ years that we were together he never changed. I thought maybe I wasn't strong enough or that it was me.

No.

He is a Narcissist. Slap the "Great Guy" label on him and I can show you 5 people that will show you otherwise.

I will never meet his new wife. Why? He has too much to lose. The lies he has wove will unravel and fall broken around his ears.

I don't have to slander my ex. I don't have to tell a bunch of lies. Nor do I want to. I can't forget about my past or let it go. I blog not to create drama but to let others they are not alone.They don't have to be stuck in an abusive relationship.

I share my story as a reminder that I could be your Sister, Mother, Daughter, Aunt, Grandmother, or Friend.

Most importantly I share my story to heal my Spirit!

If you know someone that is an abusive situation please share my blog! Help can be a phone call away. If you can visit http://www.thehotline.org for information on how to help or how you can get help!

Dearest Blog reader you are not alone! I am cheering for you! You can email me at blessmeplz@gmail.com, put "Hope" in the subject line! And bear with me I don't always get to my mail right away. You can also view my page on FB as Humbled Hearts where I share info on a variety of other topics that are not just abuse related.

Stay strong! God bless and big hugs! Oh and where's my dang crown?
Mel















                                                                         

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