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Brook, IN, United States
Abuse doesn't stop at the court room. Melinda has shared her battles in her life and through the court room as she navigates through the legal system Bringing encouragement, insight and empowerment to those that are in a abusive relationship. She is in the process of creating a new life, speaking engagements to "Break the Silence" of abuse, while putting a face to abuse. She is currently working on writing a book about her experiences as a Survivor.View short Bio here- https://www.patheos.com/blogs/ahappymedium/2013/02/notbrokenbutbrave/

Monday, December 12, 2011

So you left him now what?

Your eyes are red, nose looks like Rudolph, salt stains seem to be perminately tattooed to your cheeks, so now what?

Stop checking your email and phone for messages from him.

Think about your future. It seems bleak right now.

You may be in a situation where you have no job, no place to go and no money. If you have kids you have an additional worry.

IF you planned your escape then I am hoping you had a "Go Bag" together so you aren't left without things you really need or important papers. Hopefully you have a small stash of cash on hand. If not make sure you find contact information for the nearest Women's shelter. They can provide you with information to help you on your new journey!

This is a new start for you! You can make it! Brush off those thoughts of doing yourself harm or getting revenge on him. It's pointless!

Put your Big Girl panties on and realize you can make it!

Make a list of everything you can think of that you have together. From the toaster to the ice trays!
Make a list of where you want to be in 6 months, a year or 2 years!

Do things you always wanted to do! Take up a new hobby! Spend time with your kids or pets. Learn to love yourself all over again.

Small steps but you can do it!

4 comments:

  1. Oh dear, I so wish that I could do this without leaving him, but he is back to his antics, so I think it's becoming inevitable. I look like a tear-stained Rudolph while I'm still with him.

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  2. Leaving was a really hard decision and I kept thinking of how I wouldnt be able to make it on my own. I was wrong. not going to lie it was difficult but I never thought i'd feel any sort of relief.

    making a list of things im proud of and things I wanted to do did help me. It took time to heal and im still healing but im glad i got the courage to finally leave the guy.

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  3. The Teacher,
    It is crude and rough for me to say but he is never going to change. The roller coaster of emotions and pain he puts you through is terrible! The longer you stay the more of a toll it places on your health and well being. You deserve so much more. And as r33na says it isn't going to be easy. It was also one of the hardest things I ever done as well. But you can do it! You can heal and gain your sanity back!

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  4. r33na
    Good Girl! WAHOO! Once the tears are dried and the heartache is on the road to healing it is amazing what you can do! Great idea about making a list of things you are proud of!I'm happy for you!

    ReplyDelete