I am safe
I believe in myself
I can trust others
I can trust me
I am free to be myself
I am worthy of love
I am fit and healthy
I am confident
I am loved~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
These words a few years ago would be meaningless or meant for someone else. They could not be for me. I'm the fat, stupid, dumb ass that was not worth a *hit.
I was the one that couldn't do anything right.
I was the one that seemed clumsy and was getting hurt all the time
I was the one that acted like everything was fine
I was the one that couldn't look at myself in the mirror
I was the one who cried myself to sleep alot
I was the one that slept with a knife under my side of the bed just in case
I was the one who had marks on her throat from where she was choked
I was the one that was losing her hair in patches because of the hair pulling and nerves
I was the one that felt embarassed
I was the one that felt all alone
I know now that I wasn't the one to blame! I am worthy of so much love, happiness and joy! It is taking a long process to get this deprogrammed from my head. The feeling of insecurity and fear.
I know I am a beautiful person both in and out!
I am fitter everyday!
I am smart
I learn something new about me everyday!
I am learning to do things I enjoy doing
I am loved
I have family and friends that support me
I can just get up dance and sing at the top of my lungs for any random reason because I can!
I can achieve anything I put my mind to!
Everything I need is provided
I have found a farm house that is lovely! A big yard, porch with a swing, garden, garage, 5 bedrooms, lots of space for all of us and our collections of vintage and antique finds!
I find a job I love that allows me to spend time with the kids when I need to and pays me wonderfully!
What will your list look like? Plan for the rest of the year! Start a Bucket List! Do something you always wanted to do! Create joy and a meaningful life for yourself. Don't wait for good things or good times to come to you, create the life you want! Pray and remember God wishes for us to be happy and joyful! He will provide for our needs. I recall crying to God about this but realize I have to work for it, He is not going to throw these things on my lap. It takes patience, thoughtfulness and continued prayer.
Be blessed and feel free to drop me a line if you need to talk to someone about your situation.